We had such a great, busy weekend full of family and friends. I would show you pictures, but you see my stupid computer doesn't work and neither does my stupid camera. SO I have pictures on 3 different cameras and pictures on 3 different computers. Anyway, like I said, good times this weekend. We spent Saturday at my friend, Ami's, house. See, she has triplets and they are turning one! Ami was nice enough to let me make the babies cakes! I was super excited. At the birthday party, I was looking around and immediately had millions of thoughts running through my head. My friend Sarah is pregnant. She is beautiful and happy and loving being pregnant. I am so excited for them as well, but I couldn't help but think back to my pregnancies. I regret so much about that time. I regret that I didn't enjoy it more. Honestly, both pregnancies made me feel like my butt was going to fall out at any moment (I carried them SUPER low). I counted the days until the babies came and I am sad about that now. I regret that I don't have any pictures really of when I was pregnant. I have more with Delaney than with Brody and I am so bummed. I loved feeling the babies move and knowing that I was growing somebody, but I never stopped to enjoy it. I regret that I didn't breastfeed them longer. I really do. I regret not savoring the moments of having newborns. I regret not teaching them how to sleep- so much! I regret not having pictures with the kids when they were babies. I regret not being the mom I always thought I would be. I look at Ami and she lives in every moment of her babies and I don't.....
I hate having these regrets and to be honest, they don't even scratch the surface. I don't even know why I am writing this except to maybe face these regrets and be held accountable from now on. I don't want to have regrets anymore.
Now that I have bummed everyone out, I will have fun pictures tomorrow of the awesome party and the aire show:)
And Sarah....enjoy what's left of your pregnancy and enjoy your baby:)
We're always going to have regrets. We want to be perfect mothers and be happy and smiley all the time, but that just isn't real life! You are real and honest. We just have to take it one day at a time and do the best we can and try not to have regrets. We're not going to enjoy every aspect of being a mother, but that is ok!!! It doesn't make us bad moms, just human. We love our kids and that's all that matters. By the way, the cakes were beautiful and you look great!!!
ReplyDeleteKaren....you are super sweet! Thank you for the nice words:)
ReplyDeleteNicole, I think we all have regrets in some way, shape, or form. Don't beat yourself up about it. If you really feel down, just change those things going forward. There are plenty of things that I regret...you could make yourself heartsick thinking about it all. So don't. Remember all the things you did/do right. There are far more of them!
ReplyDeleteWhat the hell? Are you trying to make me cry? Regrets? Yeah, we all have them, and that's okay. You do a heck of a job being "mom" and I appreciate the good advice you have given me on numerous occasions. The cakes were absolutely beautiful. Even better than I imagined! You have talent, girl. Thanks for the sweet comments. :) It was nice to see you at the party AND the air show!
ReplyDeletewe all have regrets ..
ReplyDeleteI also regret not enjoying being pregnant .. next time im going to try really really hard to enjoy it .
i also had PPD and i regret not enjoying kailin as a newborn.. not that i had much choice. I hope next time i dont get it and can enjoy my baby
thanks for making me cry!!! and thank you for opening my eyes. i am trying REALLY hard to enjoy my pregnancy. it's been a rough coupe of weeks and coming back to school has made things even harder. but i am determined to enjoy these last two months because i know i will never get them back. you are doing a great job!!! love you! :)
ReplyDeleteNicole you are a great mom and just enjoy what's left of the time with your babies. Boy do they grow up fast. I'm trying to do the same thing. Being an only child as well as my hubby and us having 3 kids it's a whole new experience that I try not think I should have stopped with James. But I love Jessica and Jason too, just not all the yelling and fighting that goes with it. Guess we can't have our cake and eat it too at times:)
ReplyDelete